Overview:
- Mayaa SH gets candid on the Stigma Of Divorce in South Asian culture to help many rediscover Self-worth and Independence.
- Her observations of “Stigma” attached to divorce evolved into a movement, inspiring countless others to “Stop Asking For A Closure To Be Rejected Yet Again.”
- Mayaa continues to Empower and Support others around her by being a mentor on making countless souls navigate through understanding that “Reaching Out To Someone To Get Closures Is Like Asking For Someone For Rejection All Over Again.It is because if they wished to give a closure they would have ,it is because they knew you were gonna try to talk them out of it and they did not want to have that long drawn out discussion because they knew they were never going to change their minds about you .If you want closure ,close the door and move on. If they want you back ,they know where to find you .You can replace your own validation over waiting for them to validate theirs .You cannot be waiting for a closure and probably would be sad two or three years later .Your own improvement needs to become enough for you ..”
Mayaa SH, in her discussion on “Owning Your Journey: Stop Asking For A Closure,” advocates for a shift in perspective regarding the need for closure after significant life events or relationships. She emphasizes that true closure is an internal process, not something that can be received from an external source or another person. This perspective suggests that individuals often seek an explanation, an apology, or a final conversation from others to find peace, but Mayaa SH argues that this reliance on external validation can hinder personal growth and prolong suffering.
Instead, she encourages individuals to take ownership of their emotional healing and to define their own sense of completion. This involves accepting that some questions may remain unanswered and that not every ending will provide a neat, satisfying explanation. Mayaa SH’s philosophy aligns with psychological concepts of self-compassion and resilience, where individuals learn to navigate difficult emotions and move forward without necessarily having all the pieces of the puzzle. She suggests that by releasing the expectation of external closure, individuals can empower themselves to create their own peace and meaning from their experiences. This approach is particularly relevant in situations where the other party is unwilling or unable to provide the desired closure, such as in cases of sudden endings, ghosting, or relationships with individuals who are emotionally unavailable. Ultimately, Mayaa SH’s message is about fostering internal strength and self-reliance in the face of life’s inevitable transitions and disappointments.
How do you think cultural expectations shape marriage expectations and form perspectives around it ?
Cultural expectations significantly influence marriage expectations and perspectives by shaping individuals’ understanding of what marriage entails, its purpose, and the roles within it. These expectations are often deeply ingrained through family traditions, religious beliefs, societal norms, and media portrayals, dictating everything from partner selection to marital responsibilities and even the perceived success of a union . For instance, in many collectivist cultures, marriage is often viewed as a union between families rather than solely between individuals, with expectations revolving around maintaining family honor, continuing lineage, and contributing to the collective well-being . This can lead to arranged marriages or strong parental influence in partner choice, where compatibility is often assessed based on family background, social status, and economic stability rather than purely romantic love . Conversely, in more individualistic Western cultures, romantic love, personal happiness, and individual fulfillment are often prioritized, leading to expectations of a soulmate connection, shared interests, and emotional intimacy as primary drivers for marriage .These cultural frameworks also dictate gender roles within marriage. In some cultures, traditional gender roles are strongly emphasized, with expectations for men to be providers and protectors, and for women to be caregivers and homemakers.These roles can influence expectations regarding division of labor, decision-making power, and even emotional expression within the marital relationship .For example, in societies with patriarchal structures, wives may be expected to defer to their husbands’ decisions, while in more egalitarian societies, shared decision-making and equal partnership are often expected . Furthermore, cultural expectations can influence the timing of marriage, with some cultures encouraging early marriage to ensure procreation and family continuity, while others promote later marriages after individuals have established their careers and personal independence. The concept of divorce and remarriage is also heavily influenced by cultural norms, with some cultures stigmatizing divorce and others viewing it as a more acceptable option when marital expectations are not met. Ultimately, cultural expectations provide a blueprint for what marriage “should” be, influencing individuals’ desires, choices, and experiences within their marital relationships, and shaping their perspectives on its value and purpose.
In South Asian societies, divorce is often stigmatized, particularly for women.What is your suggestion to those coping with a similar circumstance ?
Divorce in South Asian societies, particularly for women, carries significant social stigma, often leading to isolation, economic hardship, and psychological distress.Coping with such a circumstance requires a multi-faceted approach that addresses emotional, social, legal, and economic challenges.Prioritizing emotional and psychological well-being is paramount. Seeking professional help from therapists or counselors specializing in trauma, grief, and cultural sensitivity can provide a safe space to process emotions, develop coping mechanisms, and rebuild self-esteem.Support groups, either in-person or online, can also be invaluable, offering a sense of community and shared experience with others facing similar challenges. Practicing mindfulness, meditation, or engaging in hobbies can help manage stress and promote mental resilience.Establishing a strong support system is crucial. While family support may be limited due to societal pressures, identifying and nurturing relationships with understanding friends, extended family members who are supportive, or community organizations can provide emotional and practical assistance.Connecting with women’s rights organizations or NGOs focused on gender equality in South Asia can offer legal aid, counseling, and safe spaces for women experiencing divorce.Understanding legal rights and pursuing financial independence are critical steps. Consulting with lawyers specializing in family law in the relevant South Asian country is essential to understand divorce proceedings, child custody, alimony, and property division. Many organizations offer pro bono legal services or referrals to affordable legal counsel for women in vulnerable situations. Focusing on education, skill development, and career opportunities can lead to financial independence, which is a powerful tool for empowerment and breaking free from societal constraints. This might involve vocational training, pursuing higher education, or starting a small business.While challenging deeply ingrained societal norms is a long-term process, individual actions can contribute to a gradual shift. Speaking openly about experiences (when safe to do so), advocating for women’s rights, and supporting initiatives that promote gender equality can help destigmatize divorce over time.Engaging with religious leaders or community elders who are open to progressive interpretations of religious texts regarding women’s rights can also be beneficial in fostering more inclusive perspectives.Prioritizing self-care is not selfish; it is essential for healing and moving forward. This includes maintaining physical health through proper nutrition and exercise, getting adequate rest, and engaging in activities that bring joy and fulfillment.Rebuilding a new life involves setting new goals, exploring new interests, and focusing on personal growth. This could mean pursuing further education, traveling, volunteering, or dedicating time to personal passions. The journey may be challenging, but with resilience and support, it is possible to create a fulfilling life post-divorce.In some cases, where the separation is mutual and amiable, you might be able to sustain yourself with what your ex-partner provides for you.
What are some of the important lessons you would give to others while people looking for closures while navigating paths of relationship not working out ?
Navigating the end of a relationship can be a profoundly challenging experience, and finding closure is a crucial step in the healing process. While closure isn’t a single event, but rather a journey, several important lessons can guide individuals through this difficult time. One of the most significant lessons is to understand that closure often comes from within, not from the other person. Waiting for an ex-partner to provide answers or an apology can prolong the pain and hinder personal growth. Instead, focusing on self-reflection and accepting the reality of the situation is paramount.Another vital lesson is to allow yourself to grieve fully and without judgment. The end of a relationship, regardless of its duration or intensity, represents a loss, and grief is a natural response. Suppressing emotions like sadness, anger, or confusion can impede the healing process. Engaging in healthy coping mechanisms such as journaling, talking to trusted friends or family, or seeking professional help can be incredibly beneficial. It’s also important to recognize that closure doesn’t necessarily mean forgetting the relationship or the person. It’s about coming to terms with what happened, understanding your role and the other person’s role, and being able to move forward without being consumed by the past. This often involves accepting that some questions may never be fully answered, and that’s okay. Furthermore, setting healthy boundaries with your ex-partner, if contact is necessary, is crucial for maintaining emotional well-being. This might involve limiting communication, avoiding social media stalking, or even a period of no contact to allow for emotional distance and healing. Finally, focusing on self-care and rediscovering your individual identity outside of the relationship is a powerful step towards closure. This can involve pursuing hobbies, spending time with loved ones, or engaging in activities that bring joy and fulfillment.The concept of “true closure” is multifaceted and largely understood as an internal psychological process that signifies the resolution of emotional distress or uncertainty related to a significant event or relationship . It is not typically something that can be externally provided or received from another person, but rather an individual’s journey towards acceptance, understanding, and peace .This internal process often involves several key components. One crucial aspect is the acknowledgment and processing of emotions associated with the event, such as grief, anger, sadness, or confusion . This emotional work can be challenging and may require time and self-reflection. Another element is the development of a coherent narrative or understanding of what happened, even if all questions are not definitively answered . This narrative helps individuals make sense of their experiences and integrate them into their life story. Furthermore, true closure frequently involves acceptance of the reality of the situation and letting go of the desire to change the past or control outcomes that are beyond one’s influence. This acceptance can lead to a reduction in rumination and a greater capacity to move forward. While external factors, such as apologies, explanations, or rituals, can sometimes facilitate the internal process of closure, they are not a prerequisite for it and do not guarantee its attainment . For instance, an individual might find closure regarding a past relationship even if the other person never offers an apology or explanation . The journey towards true closure is highly personal and can vary significantly in duration and intensity depending on the individual and the nature of the event.
Conclusion :
For Mayaa SH , her observations on the Stigma associated with Divorce that countless women face in life after adversity is the one that is filled with Lessons and Gratitude, and it’s a chance to lead with Resilience and Joy. She hopes to Inspire others to embrace their unique paths, celebrate their Victories, and Thrive Unapologetically.
